When Whimps think they're Warriors

I can't seem to get the commentary that followed the first Democratic Debates out of my mind. The media who gas bagged about what a great job they did making a three ring circus out of the Virginia Tech tragedy felt we couldn't live without them and gave us another double dose of blather about a relatively meaningless so called debate. This stuff went on for hours.
Chris Mathews had a round table discussion and one of the very first comments was from Howard Fineman who was complementary to Hillary Clinton for her decisiveness in answering a question that went something like, what would you do if a forceful new terrorist attack occurred on U.S. soil? How quickly she used the word retaliate was his measure for praising her. He went on to say that the others were hesitant or indecisive. He also said that being a women makes it particularly important for her to show her toughness. This answer seemed to give her the edge in the debate according to Fineman although a day later a pole of North Carolinans, where the debate was held, showed Obama coming out on top.
Now, the question was obviously hypothetical and the answers were about winning votes. I'm not saying that what the candidates said doesn't reflect who they are to some extent but you have to keep the context in mind and you must sift through the performance to find the closest thing to the truth as possible. Something like the mantra that good journalist use when putting a story together.
Fineman's response was actually far more interesting to me than most of the candidates answers. He seemed eager to make this point like it was most certainly the opinion of the country and the rest of the panel seemed to agree. Andrea Mitchell only seemed less enthused about Hillary having to prove her toughness but let that slide.
What I gathered from this is that the air is still thick with the might-makes-right, shoot first, ask questions later approach to our security in this country. The standard justification for this is that 9/11 changed us as a nation. It is indisputable that 9/11 changed us and you can't hide under a blanket but what we're doing is not working. I believe 9/11 also gave the green light to a lot of people, mostly men, who for one reason or another were insecure to start with.
Granted, power is part and parcel to our system. If you think not then try to move up the ladder in a corporate environment or any organization for that matter. Capitalism, by it's very nature is no place for the faint of heart. We survive by it and it pervades our every thought.
But power, when used improperly is dangerous, particularly on the world stage and it can allow wimps to play the role of warriors even though real warriors are far better suited to deal with matters of strength.
I grew up in southern California where there was a small Samoan population. If you were lucky enough to have a Samoan friend you could go anywhere and no one would mess with you. Remember this is before hand guns became so prevalent. The Samoan guys I knew were big and tough. It seemed odd at the time that they were also nice guys, very gentle, kind and very sincere. They never started the fights even though their presence sometimes made wise guys want to. They were different than the tough white guy's I knew who were a little crazy. They all seemed to come from hard luck backgrounds, weren't very trustworthy and, they liked to start fights. Not Samoans, they had good families and were loyal to their friends and enjoyed peace.
Later in my life I spent some time working in American Samoa. It's a very interesting place with lots of unique traditions in a beautiful setting.
We were mostly on the outer Islands, actually where Margaret Mead, the anthropologist, did a lot of her work. I was assisted by a local fellow named Puna. He took us to all the villages and a translated for us.
Puna was a big tough guy. He could climb a coconut tree with bare hands. He started fires with a stick and was good with a machete and could run up a mountain in bare feet. Once he and another guy had to pull two big dogs apart that looked to be fighting till death. They were vicious and had their jaws clamped around each others throat. They got them apart somehow with the dogs snapping and biting them the whole time. Puna was fearless and well respected but he was gracious and kind just like the guys back in California.
We got friendly and talked a lot about this and that. He told me stories of the old days when Samoans were warriors navigating the Pacific with stick charts.
One day I was watching how Puna greeted the people in each village. When you spend day after day among people who speak a different language you start to notice non verbal things more. Samoa has a Chieftain system and respect shows up in body language and I'd try to figure out who the chief was but I was usually wrong. Chieftain status wasn't based on clothes, size or strength or appearance at all. When they were pointed out it usually made sense though. They always seemed calm and wise and very gracious and commanded respect. Powerful in their own right.
Another thing I noticed in Puna's greetings was the word Malo. He used it a lot and sometimes with other words and sometimes not. I knew the greeting "talofa," so I asked him once what he meant by "Malo" in greetings. He said, the best in English would be," you win, you know in case there was any problem, then you can get on with business," Well needless to say that has stuck with me my whole life.
My point is not about Howard Fineman because I don't know much about the man. But the impression he gives is typical these days and I think completely backwards. They use the tough act, the selfish arrogance, ignoring the rest of the world, picking fights and even suppressing female sensibilities where one might expect some help with perspective at a time like this.
I see it like this, truly wise self confident strong men who are unafraid, the kind that know what man is capable of, good and bad, can figure out ways to clear the air and get down to business. And the other, filled with uncertainty, knowing they're weak, use others to fight for them and try to make up for their shortcomings with a lot of bluff and bluster in the name of strength.